I'm dreading my long distance relatives

I’m dreading my long distance relatives

Are you dreading the journey to your long distance relatives?

Christmas and New Year can involve long journeys to see relatives and friends.  At Christmas in 2016 an estimated 14 million people were making significant journeys on the busiest day, December 23rd.  This year the 23rd is on a Monday, and promises to be the busiest day with people setting out on their holidays, while others go to their last day in work.

And whilst roadworks and closures are suspended for the holiday period the opposite is the case for the railways.  This Christmas people are expected to make 20 million train journeys, all whilst major rail routes and stations will be closed.

If your journey to your long distance relatives has been a nightmare then it’s all too easy to get off to a bad start.  So give yourself the best chance by setting off in good time, and not arranging to arrive at the last minute.  Adding a feeling of racing against the clock is no way to start your holiday.

Are you actually dreading the visit to your long distance relatives?

If it’s the visit itself you’re dreading, rather than the journey then, then you need to ask yourself two questions

  • What is it exactly that you’re dreading?
  • Why is it that you’re going?

If you’re dreading it because they hate Christmas or you find yourselves arguing then the links will take you to two posts that can help you deal with that.

If you’re going out of a sense of duty then you need to ask yourself what that is.  If they don’t enjoy Christmas then turning up and imposing it on them could be making things worse.  If you’re going because you feel you have to split the holidays fairly between families then you should consider the advice of Disneygeek77 and AimeeRab, two contributors to thenest.com

“See it as splitting your time not between two families, but three. You and your husband are a family, too, and the most important one. Look at a calendar and prioritize the holidays you want to spend with just the two of you, then fill in time with both sides. Also, remember that you don’t have to celebrate on the specific day.”  Disneygeek77


“It’s never going to be perfect. Time will never be split 50/50 down the middle. Do what’s best for you, and do not be afraid to adjust. If we felt we should have gone and didn’t, we apologize. If we went and felt it wasn’t a good use of time, when the next year comes, we thank the host for the invitation and send our regrets.” AimeeRab

They finish with the advice “Try for happy, not fair or perfect”.  If you bear that in mind when planning who to see, and how to get there, then a lot of that Christmas dread about long distance relatives will evaporate.